this might be the end.......

i think i have tried my best.. i really do. maybe im not the one in her heart.. im just a loner as she walks away from me.

19th Nov

Im leaving for camp soon. As i saw her nick in msn, my heart jus feel like something is squeezing hard on it. i really yearn to talk to her, but i jus cant bring myself to it, fearing will hurt her more. Even though she does not think there is someone ard who loves her alot, i will always be at a corner waiting to be there if she needs me. My feelings are so mixed up now. I dunno wat to do, wat to do to make her happy. I always thought that im gd at making her happy but im wrong.Seriously wrong. I know nuts. I sincerely pray to god will always bless her with happiness and gd care.

painful

i have always love u so much but might not be realised by u and appreciated by u. Sometimes its very hard to describe how i feel... just that my heart just feel very pain, tears jus drop on its own. U had never trust me no doubt how much effort i put in, i really did try my best, i really did. i wanna give my best to u, making u feel loved. The only thing tht i had in mind during weekdays is to see u on weekends. but im just a liar in ur eyes, a person who still love his ex-gf. it really hurts me alot by saying those words to me. i haved lied to u in the past, but i really did not lie now. who will understand me? i miss u badly and could only look at the photos i had of u. i could only keep all this in my heart. u will not believe me. no one does. i really wish i could see u, talk to u, see u smile... but that would not happen.. u will always be in my heart, take care and rem to take medicine and ur meals. i will not make u feel painful anymore.

Reflection for my ERP.

Alright, i shall start with PBL2. I felt that PBL2 is a very interesting assignment because it let us have a better understanding of what is ERP software. From there, i learn the uses of this software and the links between it and e-commerce. I also learn how to use ERP software like J.D. Edwards to do sales process from purchase to payment. The only regret i had is i did not spend more time to explore more on the software as i focus more on my IIP.

Frankly speaking, i did not do much research on week 11. Haha, i was too excited about the korea trip. Its the first time that we as a group going out on a trip. I felt that the trip is not bad as i learn about some organisations in korea and get to see different cultures and scenery. hmm... shall not talk much about the trip because talk alot about it in journal already... :)

Talking about gamebuilder, hmm... actually i learn it during my attachment program. Haha, i even set up quizzes and snake and ladder games for my company which our school does not have. But actually i think its a good way for students to learn and enjoy learning at the same time as they get to play while revising.

For the virtual chatroom, i think its a good lesson to have every weekend so that students could ask teachers questions that they don't understand. I felt that it is a good way to communicate and it is also convenient for both students and teachers.

For my IIP presentation, i felt quite sad and nearly drop tears during the end of the presentation. Its the project that i focus most and spent all my time on it. Sleepless nights, using up all my brain cells to do the validation. It was working when i was at level 6 but when i go to level 7, it din work. My PDA connection with the computer was unsuccessful. However, i will not cry over spilled milk and instead i will learn from mistake and rectify the mistake. Failure is part of success. I remember one of my tutor ask me what are the challenges we face during the project. Actually i felt that it is good to have challenges as there is no stress in life, only challenges after challenges. Challenges makes you a better man. What's life without challenges?

I felt that the strength of my team is the soft skills that we had and the determination to pull it through to the end which really touched me and give me the motivation to fight till the end.

Lastly, i would conclude that the end result is important but the process is even more important. The things that i learn during the process is an invaluable experience that will tag along for the rest of my life....